Summertime again in NYC

It’s definitely summer time in NYC. Not so much because of the 90 degree temperatures and the humidity that makes it feel like you’re breathing under water, but because of the ever increasing noise pollution that drives me (and most civilized people) insane.

It’s that time once again! Time for classless, tactless, selfish, immature, idiots to drive around the neighborhood at all hours of the night blasting their so-called “music” for all to hear. What a great bunch of humanitarians they are sharing their music with the rest of us. What would we do without them besides sleep better and be more relaxed?

The culprit here seems to be the seemingly never ending “Hip-Hop” craze. My mistake! Hip-Hop is actually a lot more than a craze; it’s a “lifestyle.” I’m not in the least bit afraid to say that it’s a lifestyle that I find both funny and sad. It’s a lifestyle that promotes anti-social thuggish behavior. It’s a lifestyle that its participants don’t seem to enjoy unless they’re able to shove it down everyone’s throat. It’s a lifestyle where walking around with your pants falling off and scowling at everyone you come across is an absolute must. It’s an angry lifestyle lived mostly by young people who should be enjoying their youth. It’s a narcissistic lifestyle where the participants are the center of their own delusional little universe.

I happen to live about 50 feet from a bodega that seems to be a magnet for bad-ass street thugs. If that’s not bad enough, my 250 square foot terrace happens to be right above a water hydrant which is used as a temporary parking spot for the bodega’s high-class clientele. What is both maddening and hilarious is that when these clowns park their cars on the hydrant and go into the bodega, they leave their windows rolled down and their music blasting on maximum volume. What the hell is that all about? Again, Hip-Hop doesn’t seem to be much fun unless you can force it on others.

My wife and I pay very good money to live where we do, but during the summer we are constantly bombarded by other people’s interpretation of music. On a nice day it’s often hard to work outside on our laptop, or to just relax with the constant stream of car radios blaring at ridiculous levels. Very often we can actually feel our couch vibrate from the bass volume from these inconsiderate morons driving down our street.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, a few weeks ago some new tenants moved into the basement apartment of the small tenement directly across the street from us. Unfortunately for us, and for the entire neighborhood, the idiotic landlord rented the space to about 4 or 5 young punks who care about nothing but their “music” and their tough-guy personas. These clowns actually put lawn-chairs out on the sidewalk (how embarrassing) while leaving the door to their basement apartment open so they and everyone else can listen to their Hispanic version of gangsta rap! We wrote a letter to the landlord and they seemed to have lowered their music a little bit, but they still act as if they’re the only people who live in the neighborhood. They often hang out in front of the building on their lounge chairs carrying on until 2:00am – and that’s on weekdays!

There seems to be little we can do besides call New York City’s 311 and make complaints that are immediately thrown in the trash after we hang up the phone. 311 is useless, as those of you who live in NY well know. Last summer I came to a boiling point and went downstairs to confront 5 or 6 low-lives who were blasting music from their parked car for hours. Though the miscreants eventually backed down (they’ll rarely fight unless it’s at least 10 to 1) and turned off the music, I was threatened with getting my throat slit by one of the brave tough guys. For me it’s almost always a no-win situation. The punks could easily pull out a gun and shoot me, or if I put one or two of them in the hospital, I’ll be arrested and they’ll wind up being the victims.

Before you libtards out there start accusing me of racism because I despise the Hip-Hop lifestyle, and because I believe that I’m entitled to some peace and quiet in my own home – take a deep breath! While it’s true that most of the brainless punks that strut their Hip-Hop bonafides in New York City are black and Hispanic, in the suburbs you have the spoiled white kids who proudly carry the Hip-Hop torch. If the punks that make summer miserable in my neighborhood were white, I would react the same way! In fact, if it weren’t for white youth, the Hip-Hop culture would have died years ago. It’s their money that keeps Russell Simmons and Fitty Cents living in mansions. Sorry, bad example; Fitty is already out – he’s 34 years old – he’s old school!

There are many reasons to hate Hip-Hop. The actual music (noise) and the ridiculous wardrobes may be the least of the reasons. It’s my belief that Hip-Hop culture keeps people down; preventing many young people from reaching their potential. It features anger, false bravado, narcissism, and confrontation over optimism, joy, and civility. Although I also despise the “hippy culture” of the 60′s and all of the current liberal assholes it produced, the hippy culture was at least educated and mostly peaceful. (Except for friends of Obama: Bill Ayers and Bernadine Dorn, of course)

I’m usually all for a live and let live philosophy, but noise can quickly cross that fine line. I don’t believe that other people have a right to invade my personal space with their noise. I don’t believe that I should be forced to listen to other people’s music in the confines of my own home. I don’t really expect it on the streets, but in my own home I believe I should be entitled to a reasonable level of peace and quiet. This is a rare instance where I believe more legislation is called for. The Bloomberg administration needs to crack down on noise pollution and the quality of life crimes that have been neglected since Rudy Giuliani left office. I won’t hold my breath! Bloomberg is so PC that he wouldn’t dare support legislation or enforce existing laws that will mostly affect people from the minority community.